Saturday, January 15, 2011

Gap off the shoulder dolman tee, VS tank, Gap dark wash vintage flare, gray TOMS, Forever21 large silver earrings.

Things that happened today that me feel like I,  quite possibly, have had a boost of confidence:  

I spent the morning running errands for family in the hospital while the kiddos played at a friends house (THANK YOU Sara, Arlie and Mrs. Janice).  By the way, the update on the family in the hospital is that things are looking...better?  Keep praying.  The kids playing at a friends house is a BIG DEAL;  I only talk to people in ways that I don't have to any real personal interaction (via facebook), in casual passing (grocery store, 711, mall), if they are my family, or if my life situation requires me to (work...etc...well, hmm, there is only work).  When my phone rings, if it is not Jay, my mom, dad, or sister, I stare at the phone and anxiety fills my whole body--most of the time I can't bring myself to answer.  When it stops ringing, I sit, filled with anxiety and then wonder to the point of insanity WHAT THE HELL THEY WANTED. So, as you can imagine, I never never never never never ask people outside of my family for help.  Since family has been in the hospital, I have done two things out of the norm: 1.  Talked to people (I actually called someone).  2.  Relied on others (outside of family).  Now, I will say this, (I am going to toot my horn a bit) I am actually quite remarkable in stressful situations or when there is a crisis--really, I am fantastic.   I thrive under REAL pressure, yet have major social anxiety...I know, I don't understand this either. Having family in the hospital, I believe, falls under the category of "stressful" even "crisis situation". Regardless, calling and asking for help, and actually allowing the help to happen IS A BIG DEAL.  

Things that happened today that made me feel......(tilt my head and shrug my shoulders) "Meh" (pronounced m-ehhhh):

1.  When walking to the elevator (I was probably 10 feet away) holding THREE Big Gulps, an overnight bag on one shoulder and my purse on the other, the elevator doors closed and I heard the old man inside chuckle.  2.  Rafe came out of the Jason's Deli bathroom with his pants and underwear at his ankles and walked all the way back to our table without ME noticing (everyone, EVERYONE else noticed).  3.  Rafe told me he wanted a bird to peck me.  

Boost in confidence?  Eh? Meh.


The Stottlemyre Chronicles said...

I'm sorry your having a yucky day. You look pretty though! I understand your phone thing, but the help thing your insane. I don't know what I would do without friends to help out. I would help you if you need it any time. You can even fb me and I will come and play with your babies so you can have a break or I can even go to the store for you, because I am one who does not like leaving the house and especially going out to the store with the kids and I think it would be good for me to do it for someone else sometimes. Going out of my comfort zone could help me and you. Anyways lots of prayers for family in hospital and for you. Keep your head up and keep dressing.

Vanessa said...

Megan! I LOVE YOU.

Cristina Cathey said...

So funny thing about the phone thing; Earlier this evening (before I read this post) I was at the grocery store and I was going to call you and ask about what I needed to make baked kale chips.....but I didn't. Next time I will and you better answer ;) I'm sorry to hear about your family and I hope things get better sooner rather than later. XO

Vanessa said...

OF COURSE I would post something about how weird I am about phone calls on a day you think about calling me...hahahha! When I read about those Kale chips, people REALLY REALLY seemed to like them. I made them and they had great flavor (and I hate the taste of Kale) but I couldnt get past the texture. Usually I am not a texture person...But it really felt like I was eating tissue paper.

Kale Chips recipe: Kale, torn into small pieces, toss in olive oil, sea salt, fresh cracked black pepper back @ 400 degrees until slightly browned.

Now, I may have burnt mine...maybe that is why they had a tissue paper texture.

I meant to answer this a while ago--YES we are still doing something for my birthday. I AM DYING TO SEE YOU! Things seem to be getting better with our family in the hospital situation, BUT, that would be the only thing that could postpone the PAR-TAY-ING. It will probably be Iguana then Friends. I need to find out when JAy has off, IF he took of for my birthday, then I will get it planned and send a little facebook invite!